Hey, What's Wrong with a Little Domestic Violence? Amiright?

When Women Became No Longer Equal, Part 9: Nothing Wrong with a Little Domestic Violence, right?

It's all the fault of those pesky women, isn't it? Always wanting to be treated as if they are human beings. Those damn women are the reason things have gone to shit. At least according to the repugnant J.D. Vance, a misogynist who is hoping to be able to lord it over women as a U.S. Senator, representing the state of Ohio (or, maybe, the men of Ohio).

Sure, Vance wants all those demanding womenfolk "to have opportunities . . . to have choices," really, he does, but while that's all fine and good and he's perfectly okay with it, really, he is, still, you gotta agree with him when he says that "women and boys in the womb" (huh????) obviously should have greater rights to "opportunity" and "choices" than those full-grown female human beings. In other words, he's forced birth all the way. 

For women (or girls, like the 10-year-old Ohio child who had to go to Indiana for her necessary reproductive care), Vance is just full of sympathy--every pregnancy, without exception, is just a wonderful "opportunity," he declares. A woman whose pregnancy is the result of incest--or a little girl whose pregnancy is caused by rape--well, they should take advantage of these wonderful opportunities. They shouldn't be able to have an abortion, just because their pregnancies might be a bit "inconvenient" for them. (Again, his words.)

Abortion is "slavery," he proclaims. Women's loss of their fundamental rights is really an "amazing victory!" he cheers. Up is down! Black is white!

And another damn thing women have tried to ruin is marriage. Because, you know, if women have rights, if they are actual, real, human beings with thoughts, feelings, and the freedom to make decisions for themselves, well, they can just decide to end a bad marriage. (Or maybe not get married in the first place, but Vance doesn't even consider that horror.)

At Pacifica Christian High School (I'm not sure if he was speaking to high-school students, but I sure as hell hope not), as part of an event billed as part of "The Great Conversation Series" (here's the announcement), Vance weighed in, offering an astonishing and benighted view of marriage: 

Culturally, something has clearly shifted. I think it’s easy but also probably true to blame the sexual revolution of the 1960s. My grandparents had an incredibly chaotic marriage in a lot of ways, but they never got divorced, right? They were together to the end, ’til death do us part. That was a really important thing to my grandmother and my grandfather. That was clearly not true by the 70s or 80s. And I think that probably, I was personally and a lot of kids in my community, who grew up in my generation, personally suffered from the fact that a lot of moms and dads saw marriage as a basic contract, right? Like any other business deal, once it becomes no longer good for one of the parties or both of the parties, you just dissolve it and go onto a new business relationship. But that recognition that marriage was sacred I think was a really powerful thing that held a lot of families together. And when it disappeared, unfortunately I think a lot of kids suffered. . . .

His grandmother and grandfather's marriage? As Vance detailed in his fantasy "memoir," Hillbilly Elegy, his grandparents tried their best to kill one another. 'Til "death do us part" indeed. 

As for deciding to end a marriage? To consider that "one of the parties" (always have to be "moms and dads," right?) might decide a marriage "no longer good"? Stick it out no matter what! Vance insists. (Or, I suppose, until one partner kills the other.)

And while Vance gestures toward the notion that "dads" as well as "moms" who might find a marriage needs to end, look again--the real blame is to be found in "the sexual revolution of the 1960s." Guess who was liberated as a result of that revolution . . . 

So what's his advice? Here's the thing that has caused an uproar since Vance's comments, recorded in September 2021, were published by Vice this week: 

This is one of the great tricks that I think the sexual revolution pulled on the American populace, which is the idea that like, ‘well, OK, these marriages were fundamentally, you know, they were maybe even violent [emphasis added], but certainly they were unhappy. And so getting rid of them and making it easier for people to shift spouses like they change their underwear, that’s going to make people happier in the long term. . . .

Sure, J.D., what's wrong with a little domestic violence? Gotta stay on brand . . . 

Meanwhile, may I remind you: 

• On average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States. During one year, this equates to more than 10 million women and men.
• 1 in 4 women and 1 in 9 men experience severe intimate partner physical violence, intimate partner contact sexual violence, and/or intimate partner stalking with impacts such as injury, fearfulness, post-traumatic stress disorder, use of victim services, contraction of sexually transmitted diseases, etc. 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have experienced some form of physical violence by an intimate partner. This includes a range of behaviors (e.g. slapping, shoving, pushing) and in some cases might not be considered "domestic violence."
• 1 in 7 women and 1 in 25 men have been injured by an intimate partner.
• 1 in 10 women have been raped by an intimate partner. Data is unavailable on male victims.
• 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men have been victims of severe physical violence (e.g. beating, burning, strangling) by an intimate partner in their lifetime.
• 1 in 7 women and 1 in 18 men have been stalked by an intimate partner during their lifetime to the point in which they felt very fearful or believed that they or someone close to them would be harmed or killed.
• On a typical day, there are more than 20,000 phone calls placed to domestic violence hotlines nationwide.
• The presence of a gun in a domestic violence situation increases the risk of homicide by 500%.
• Intimate partner violence accounts for 15% of all violent crime.
• Women between the ages of 18-24 are most commonly abused by an intimate partner.
• 19% of domestic violence involves a weapon.
• Domestic victimization is correlated with a higher rate of depression and suicidal behavior.
• Only 34% of people who are injured by intimate partners receive medical care for their injuries.

 (These numbers are from the National Coalition against Domestic Violence; for full statistics, click here.)

I've written about this topic before (click here and here and here and here and even here, with another asshole whining about when marriage and women were "sacred"). It never goes away.

And let's not forget. The Violence against Women's Act was passed by Congress and signed by President Bill Clinton in 1994. The law was expanded and improved in reauthorizations of 2000, 2005, and 2013. Republican opposition to reauthorization of the VAWA delayed its authorization--yeah, those guys again. The act was finally reauthorized in March 2022, but it could never manage to get support from Republicans, much less a vote, in the U.S. Senate. It was finally passed as part of an omnibus appropriations package.*

The video of Vance's remarks is widely available online, but I refuse to embed it or link to it here. You can find it if you must. 

*The assholes running things now have removed the “Fact Sheet: Reauthorization of the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA)” from the White House “Briefing Room” where this was originally posted. Because of course they have. It’s been preserved by the Internet Archive’s Wayback Machine, and I’ve updated the link here. 

Update, 4 April 2026: A reader has reached out, suggesting that I might want to provide a link to resources available to victims of domestic violence, sexual assault, sexual abuse, and harassment Helping Survivors of Sexual Abuse and Assault is a good place to start (click here). 

Back to the Future, Part 3: Women's Edition

The Women's March--Defending Roe v. Wade (22 January 1973)

Photo from Seattle's The Stranger,
announcing the Seattle Women's March,
21 January 2017

Today is the anniversary of the landmark Roe v. Wade decision--it took the Supreme Court to ensure that American women had some measure of control over their own bodies. But today women's reproductive freedom is under threat like never before in the more than forty years since 1973.

Yesterday, unprecedent numbers of feminists--women and men, who have always supported women's rights--marched in support of women's equality and rights. There were some 600 marches in cities and towns through the U. S., and over 40 in cities around the world. The largest event, drawing hundreds of thousands of women, was in Washington, D. C. (Evidently DJT's feelings are hurt that more people attended the march in D. C. than showed up at his inauguration. Sad.)

The more things change . . .

The first notable march on Washington undertaken by women--in support of suffrage--was in 1913, one day before the inauguration of Woodrow Wilson.*

And there was the Women's Strike for Equality on 26 August 1973--the biggest turnout may have been in New York, but over a thousand women marched in Washington D. C.. This nationwide strike was scheduled on the fiftieth anniversary of the passage of the Nineteenth Amendment.

Just four years later, on 26 August 1977, there was the Alice Paul Memorial March--Alice Paul had proposed the Equal Rights Amendment in 1923, and it still hadn't been passed. This march was in support of the amendment's passage. A year later, on 9 July 1978, some 100,000 women demonstrated in Washington D. C., again in support of the Equal Rights Amendment--it was "the largest march for women’s rights in the nation’s history."

Numerous marches to support women's equality have followed, beginning in 1986. 

But, of course, the Equal Rights Amendment was never passed, and here we are. It is now 2017, and women's rights are still not guaranteed under the constitution. And reproductive rights--including those guaranteed under Roe--are threatened.

Yesterday's Women's March was held on the day after the "presidential inauguration"--and it neatly coincides with the anniversary of the Roe. v. Wade decision (decided 22 January 1973).

It's going to be a tough time for women in this period of "making America great again." Don't forget. Don't give up. Stay strong. 

For Parts 1 and 2 of Back to the Future, click here and here.

As for me--did I march yesterday??? Well, ummmm, earlier this month, I was outside pruning my wisteria and I fell off a ladder, breaking my leg and snapping my ACL I am now confined to the house, hobbling around on crutches. But when I fell, I was wearing this shirt:

*Update, 14 January 2026: In its willful destruction of history, the Trump horde of vandals has erased this page from the White House website. The link now takes you to a “404 page not found” error code, which I have left in. But the page has been preserved at the Internet Archive—click here. 

Mahalia Jackson, the Queen of Gospel

Mahalia Jackson (born 26 October 1911)

The daughter of Charity Clark and John Jackson, Mahalia Jackson was born in New Orleans and raised in a multi-generational home where she was surrounded by an extended family and by the music of artists like Ma Rainey and Bessie Smith.

Mahalia Jackson

After moving to Chicago as a teenager, in 1927, Jackson quickly went from singing in a church choir to singing professionally. Although she was influenced by the Blues singers whose recordings she was familiar with in her childhood, Jackson refused to sing secular music. 

She toured and recorded throughout the 1930s and 1940s, but she also took less glamorous jobs--as a laundress and as a beautician, for example--before she became a "success." That came with her 1948 recording of "Move on Up a Little Higher" sold over eight million copies--fifty years later, in 1998, this recording was acknowledged with a Grammy Hall of Fame award.

Mahalia Jackson was the first gospel singer to perform at Carnegie Hall (in 1950) and, among many other musical "firsts," she was the first gospel performer to sing at the Newport Jazz Festival (1958).

In addition to her role as a musician, Mahalia Jackson was actively involved in the Civil Rights Movement. Despite death threats, she gave a concern in Montgomery in 1956 in order to raise money to support the bus boycotts, and she was a regular performer at events sponsored by the Southern Christian Leadership Conference after its founding in 1957.

Most memorable, perhaps, was her 1963 performance on the occasion of the Poor People's March on Washington, 27 August. Five years later, in 1968, she sang at Martin Luther King's funeral. 

Mahalia Jackson at the 1963
March on Washington

Jackson died on 27 January 1972, just sixty years old. Unlike so many in the music industry, who died in poverty and obscurity, she died a wealthy and beloved figure. She also left a legacy that continues. 

You might enjoy Sonari Glinton's All Things Considered piece on Mahalia Jackson, "The Voice of the Civil Rights Movement." You can listen by clicking here. There are several excellent biographies, but, for right now, why not just enjoy the music? Here's a recording of "How I Got Over," the same song she sang, right before King delivered his address at the 1963 March on Washington. (There are many other wonderful performances available on YouTube.)

Jane Addams, Reformer and Activist

Jane Addams (born 6 September 1860)

It's astonishing just to list the many roles of Jane Addams: social worker, social reformer, and co-founder of Hull House; teacher and member of Chicago's Board of Education; international peace activist; women's rights and suffrage activist; philosopher; and lecturer and writer.

Jane Addams, c. 1910-1915

In 1931, the Nobel Peace Prize was jointly awarded to Jane Addams and Nicholas Murray Butler. Addams was recognized for her role as president of the Women's International League for Peace and Freedom, an organization she founded in 1919. The Nobel committee also noted her role in helping the poor and, in particular, her efforts in relationship to child labor and for her aid to immigrants at Hull House.

One of Jane Addams's long-time partners was Ellen Gates Starr, whom she met when they both attended the Rockford Female Seminar in Rockford, Illinois. Although Jane Addams is better known as the founder of Hull House, the settlement house project was co-founded with Starr, both of them inspired by their trip to Europe and, in particular, their contact with the English settlement-house movement.

Addams's most enduring intimate relationship was with Mary Rozet Smith, with whom she had a thirty-year committed partnership. For Jennifer Brandel’s excellent article on their relationship, click here. The Jane Addams Hull-House Museum recently included a Gender and Sexuality Tour, addressing the question, "Was Jane Addams a Lesbian?"* (You may also appreciate this interview on Addams and Hull House education programs, including the LGBTQ+ tour.)

Jane Addams died on 21 May 1935, a year after Smith's death.

Some of the best information about Addams is available through the Nobel website, including a biographical essay, complete bibliography, a photo gallery, and links to useful online resources (click here).

Hull House

*Update, 6 September 2026: I hope it is not a sign of these horrible times, but I can no longer find information about the Gender and Sexuality tour at the Hull House website. The link here will take you to what has been preserved at the Internet Archive’s Wayback Machine. 

Mary McLeod Bethune: "First Lady of the Struggle"

Mary McLeod Bethune (born 10 July 1875)

Mary McLeod Bethune was a noted educator and civil rights activist, the only woman among the African American policy makers and advisers who worked (unofficially, of course) with President Franklin D. Roosevelt, beginning about 1935, in what has become known as the "black cabinet."

Mary McLeod Bethune, 1949

Mary Mcleod was born on 10 July 1875 in Maysville, South Carolina, the fifteenth child of Samuel and Patsy McLeod. Her parents had been born into slavery--as had all of her siblings. Like all the members of the family, she picked cotton--but unlike the other members of her family, she had a chance to go to school.

McCleod went on to become a teacher herself. In 1898 she married a fellow teacher, Albertus McLeod (she kept his name but left Albertus in 1907). With him she moved to Florida, where in 1904 she opened the Daytona Beach Literary and Industrial School for Training Negro Girls with only five students.

Enrollment quickly grew, and within a few years reached 250 students. That school merged with the Cookman Institute for Men in 1923. Now Bethune-Cookman University, the college proudly includes a biography of Mary McLeod Bethune on its website.

In addition to her role as an educator, Bethune was a member of the National Association of Colored Women, she founded the National Council of Negro Women, and, in 1936, joined the National Youth Administration, a WPA agency (she quickly became the director of the Division of Negro Affairs).

In 1945, President Harry Truman named Mary McLeod Bethune to the founding conference of the United Nations--since no African nation sent a female delegate, she is sometimes said to have been the voice of "all the world's women of color." 

From 1931, she was also actively involved in the emerging civil rights movement--and she lived to witness the U.S. Supreme Court's 17 May 1954 Brown v. Board of Education decision. She also sounded a note of caution in her column in the Chicago Defender, urging her readers not to be deterred by those who threatened violence. Desegregation was a "constitutional duty"-- and a moral imperative:

There are those speaking for us who say we do not want equality and did not want integration. . . . It is not history repeating itself, it is the same history. The law of the land has freed us and guarantees us the right to vote, to earn our living, and now to go to school without distinction or discrimination. Let no man, black or white, say for the rest of us that we do not want to be full citizens. History still speaks. It speaks for the rights of all citizens. And it will not be quiet. 

Nor was Bethune quiet. Although she died just a year later, she left a "Last Will and Testament" passing on her values "to Negroes everywhere in the hope that an old woman's philosophy may give them inspiration." 

"Here, then," she writes, is my legacy: "I leave you love, . . . I leave you hope, . . . I leave you the challenge of developing confidence in one another, . . . I leave you a thirst for education, . . . I leave you respect for the uses of power, . . . I leave you faith, . . . I leave you racial dignity, . . . I leave you with a desire to live harmoniously with your fellow men, . . . I leave you finally a responsibility to our young people." (You can read the entire document by clicking here.

Roosevelt and Bethune

There are many good biographies to choose from, but I'll start you off with this excellent essay from the National Women's History Museum website--in addition to this detailed biography, the site links you to a variety of online resources and provides an excellent bibliography.

The documentary film Eleanor Roosevelt, produced as part of the PBS American Experience series, focuses in part on the cooperative relationship between these two remarkable women--you should be able to access this documentary online via your local PBS station. There's also a great interview--Roosevelt interviewing Bethune--available via the NEH Preservation Project; you can access it by clicking here.

1985 U.S. postage stamp

Update, 13 July 2022: A statue of Mary McLeod Bethune was today installed in the U.S. Capitol's Statuary Hall, the first Black American to be represented there with a state statue. (Each state has two statues honoring notable citizens in the hall, just off the floor of the House.) The dedication ceremony was hosted by Nancy Pelosi, Speaker of the House, who noted that Bethune's statue replaced one of a "little-known Civil War general" in an act "trading a traitor for a civil rights hero." 

The statue was sculpted by Nilda Comas, a Fort Lauderdale artist who was selected from some 1,600 applicants for the commission. Her sculpture of Bethune, The Black Rose, represents another first--Comas is "the first Hispanic-American woman to have her statue selected for placement in the National Statuary Hall."